Cannabis 101: A Guide for the Curious, the Skeptical, and the Am I Doing This Right? crowd
By Dexter, Founder of Dexter Co
There are generally two types of people who tell me they don’t like cannabis.
The first is the "I tried it once and hated it" person. My response? "Were you drunk when you tried it?" And without fail, the answer is yes. Let’s get this straight: mixing alcohol and cannabis is a terrible idea. If your first experience involved a few too many cocktails and then taking a hit off whatever your friend passed you, no wonder it didn’t go well. That’s like blaming sushi for your food poisoning when you ate it from a gas station.
The second type is the "Every time I try it, I don’t like the way I feel" person. This is almost always due to one of two things: the wrong strain or the wrong dose. If you’ve only tried a heavy Indica, of course, you felt like a human puddle. If you took too much THC, of course, you felt overwhelmed. The key to actually enjoying cannabis is knowing what you’re consuming and how much.
So, if you’re curious but hesitant, let’s break it down. Consider this your personal roadmap to understanding cannabis without the confusion, the mistakes, or the panic-Googling of "how to stop being high."
The Basics: What Cannabis Actually Is
Cannabis isn’t just one thing—it’s an entire family of plants with different effects. There are three main categories, each with its own personality:
Sativa: The Energy Booster
Sativas are known for their uplifting, creative, and focus-enhancing effects. Think of them as the espresso of cannabis—great for daytime use, brainstorming sessions, or finally tackling that closet you’ve been meaning to organize.
Indica: The Chill Master
If Sativa is espresso, Indica is a glass of red wine at the end of the day. Indicas help with relaxation, stress relief, and sleep. The easiest way to remember? Indica = In ‘Da Couch. Take too much, and your productivity for the evening is officially canceled.
Hybrid: The Middle Ground
Hybrids are the best of both worlds, combining Sativa and Indica to create balanced effects. Some lean more Sativa (energetic but not jittery), while others lean Indica (relaxing but not coma-inducing). Hybrids are a great entry point if you’re not sure where to start. I personally look at resources like Leafly and their consumer reviews to get a good feel for what particular effects a strain might have.
But beyond Sativa vs. Indica, the real magic comes from THC and CBD.
- THC (Tetrahydrocannabinol) – The one that gets you high.
- CBD (Cannabidiol) – The one that doesn’t get you high but may help with pain, anxiety, and inflammation.
Some products have just CBD (great for relief without intoxication), while others have a mix of THC and CBD to balance the effects.
How You Consume Cannabis Matters
How you consume cannabis completely changes the experience. Here’s a cheat sheet:
Smoking or Vaping: The Fast Track
If you inhale cannabis, you’ll feel it within minutes—which makes it the easiest way to control your dose. But if you take one too many hits, you’ll know it quickly.
Best for: People who want fast effects and easy control.
Caution: It can be harsh on your lungs, and not everyone likes the smell.
Edibles: The Sneaky Powerhouse
Cannabis-infused foods, drinks, and gummies are delicious, discreet, and long-lasting—but they take 30 minutes to 2 hours to kick in.
Best for: People who don’t want to inhale anything and want longer effects.
Caution: Many people make the classic mistake of thinking "This isn’t working," then eating more. Start with 2.5-5mg of THC and WAIT.
Topicals: Relief Without the High
Cannabis-infused lotions and balms can help with pain, soreness, and inflammation—but they don’t get you high.
Best for: Athletes, people with chronic pain, or anyone who wants relief without intoxication.
Tinctures & Oils: The Middle Ground
A few drops under your tongue work faster than edibles but slower than smoking. It’s also easier to dose precisely.
Best for: People who want quick effects without inhaling anything.
A Friendly (But Absolutely Necessary) Disclaimer
Before you run off to your nearest dispensary, let’s be clear: I am not a doctor, and neither is Dexter Co. (Shocking, I know.) This guide is here to educate and entertain, not replace actual medical advice from someone with, you know, a medical degree.
Cannabis affects everyone differently, and while I’d love to say you’ll find your dream strain on the first try, the truth is: it’s a journey, my friend. Some trial and error is part of the deal.
And for the love of all things good, talk to your doctor before diving into cannabis—especially if you take medication or have any health concerns. Cannabis is incredible, but like karaoke at a family wedding, it’s best enjoyed responsibly.
One final word of wisdom: Do not, under any circumstances, text your ex after trying cannabis for the first time. Or the second time. Or ever. Trust me on this one.
Final Thoughts: Cannabis, Simplified
Cannabis isn’t a one-size-fits-all experience. It’s about finding the right product, the right dose, and the right moment. Whether you’re looking for pain relief, relaxation, or a little creative boost, there’s something out there for you.
So be curious, start small, and enjoy the ride. And if you ever need a smart, stylish, and slightly sarcastic guide along the way—well, Dexter Co has you covered.
Let's Dex,
Dexter
Founder, Dexter Co
